For Better or Wurst

Nico and I are getting married! It came as a bit of a surprise, as we had both said how ambivalent we felt about getting married again. At the same time, we had admitted that although there was a part of us that didn’t really see the point of marriage, we both kind of wanted it.

So a couple weeks ago as we were walking through the Stadtpark (the Central Park of Hamburg), we were talking about our travel plans (Namibia and Botswana in March/April) and baby plans (after the trip to Africa). We agreed that we wanted to travel sooner rather than later so that we could get on with the baby-making. Nico’s sister recently told us that it would be better to go in September or October (she lived in Namibia for a while), but Nico and I both felt like we didn’t want to wait that long. On this walk, I asked him what he thought about the idea of getting married before we had a baby. He said he wouldn’t really want to have a baby without getting married. We started talking about why we wanted to get married. Then we started talking about what kind of ceremony/party we would want to have. Where it would be. When it would be. Then there was a pause in all the planning and he said, “So, is this official now? Do you want to get married?” And I said yes, and we hugged and cried and all that. Then we spent a little while looking at each other and laughing, saying how crazy it all is. Meeting in Guatemala, all of our subsequent rendez-vous, and what our lives had been like since I moved here just three months ago. We talked about how quickly it has all happened, but how strong we feel our relationship is for all that we have been through.

In the days since then, Nico has told me nearly daily how excited he is to marry me and that he doesn’t want to wait until July. We haven’t told the kids yet, because of the Christmas madness. But they have been saying since they met me that they want us to get married. Last time we played Jenga as a family, Friederike said, “You should get married because you play Jenga together so well.” Sounds reasonable to me…Just this weekend, they were talking about how they wanted us to get married so that they could throw rose petals on the aisle. Unfortunately for them, that would never happen at any wedding of mine, but nonetheless, I think they’ll be okay with our decision to get married.